Can't let it go

Another blogger reported this week that her son was in a serious accident. When she got the call she was 2 hours away with her 2 youngest in the car. Her drive back must have felt so surreal and I can certainly empathize with the terror in her heart. Yesterday marked the 4 month anniversary of Katie's accident. I no longer think of it every day, but I have started dreaming about it. The dreams are always the same. The call, rushing to the scene, not being able to find her, to see her. The sounds of the Life flight helicopter. The darkness lit up by flashing lights and spotlights. Terror. Heart-pounding uncontrollably terror. Maybe this is the way my mind is working through it. Kind of an exorcism of the pain through dreams.

Physically she is all healed up but emotionally we both have a ways to go. She is dealing with it better than I am. I wonder sometimes if she really understands the severity of what happened? Can her teenage, undeveloped brain grasp the real impact of what nearly happened? Somehow I don't think so. Maybe that is a safety mechanism for kids. Maybe they are not equipped to deal with the serious stuff yet, so they are unable to process it like we do.

Here is the car at the scene. The front passenger seat is on the upside of the car, and the crumpled door is what is sticking up into the air. This is how the car landed after it rolled and hit the cement culvert.

This is the seat where katie was sitting. The metal across the doorway is actually the frame of the car, pushed up when it hit the culvert. Only because the frame came up like this was Katie's seat not ejected from the car. As it was, it came loose and the headrest was actually sticking out of the window. Her right hip and leg took the brunt of the force, pulling her hip out of the socket momentarily and fracturing her leg. Miniscule injuries in the bigger picture. I can only think that God held her in his hands as that car tumbled out of control. That his tender care kept her safe from serious injury or worse. My own little miracle.