Stop Thief!

To all of you who knit, I am still cracking up over some of the stories the Yarn Harlot told. She hasn't updated her blog with her Houston stop yet, but when she does I will point out my group in her sock photo.

When I told Katie I wouldn't be home that evening because I was going to a book signing by my favorite knitting humorist, she looked at me and said, "Mom, why do you have to be such a nerd'. I was instantly inspired to knit her a Christmas present. And it will be intentionally hideous. And I will post pictures of her with it on the internet. Bwah hah hah...don't mess with Mom!

Back to the topic of the title. I grew up in the midwest, born to thoroughly midwestern people of a truly good and decent nature. I reflexively hand back money if someone hands me too much change. I wait politely at intersections for the people on my right to cross first. I always use my turn signal. I have never cheated on a test. I guess you could say that my sense of right and wrong is well developed (actually the little voice in my head, which sounds surprisingly like my mother, would never leave me alone if I did something wrong intentionally) I strive to be a good citizen in all ways.

Yesterday after work was one of those crazy-errand running chicken/head cut off kinds of nights. My last stop before dropping Katie at cheer practice was the grocery store. Herd kids in, bark orders, grab needed items, throw in more un-needed items, dash to checkout, pay, remember to get cash back to hand out lunch money and head for the parking lot. Everybody buckled in, begin to back out, guy beside me backs out. I stop and wait. Then guy behind me takes turn. (I am already partly into the row) I wait. Then old man walks behind, and while I am waiting on him, third car pulls out behind me. At this point I am growling and mumbling but I finally get backed out and Katie blurts out, "That man is stealing something!"

I look towards the store and there is a 20-something guy, long hair, scruffy clothes, clutching something under his shirt and running out of the store. He keeps looking back over his should, and then he dives behind a car and climbs in. Without even thinking, I gun the engine and drive my mini-van right behind his vehicle and park it. There is a pole in front of him and me behind him. The older guy driving leans out of his window and looks back at me, and I have to say he was a scary kind of guy. Katie shrieks something about 'What if they have a gun?" and I snap to my senses. What am I thinking? Am I going to jump out, grab the guy by the collar and march him into the store? I don't think so! So I pulled forward and the guy shot out of the spot and took off, too fast for me to even get his license number. Arghhh!!!

I was sooooo angry! Not only did he steal something from the store I frequent, which ends up pushing up prices for the rest of us, but he did it in front of my kids! I want to kick his scruffy little arse! If only my husband would let me get that Hummer with the missile launcher on the top, then I could get me some vigilante justice.....