Thursday, August 28, 2008

Caught between Heaven and Hell

Heaven: Ahren continues to be delightful. We spent most of yesterday seeing doctors and having some simple tests done. I don't want to have him poked and prodded too much but we need to rule out or treat anything contagious before we let him socialize much. So, poo-poo samples off to the lab (believe me, this is a never-ending renewable source) stop in at the imaging center for a couple of chest x-rays to rule out TB, and then several hours at the orthopedist following up on what the foster mother told me. (She felt he had trouble walking and fell too much so she took him to an ortho in Guatemala. That doctor prescribed orthotic shoes which look like Frankenstein boots. They rubbed his little ankles badly and he hated wearing them) The doctor here feels he has low muscle tone, hyper-flexibility and some concerns with his left leg (he scrunches his toes up, tippy-toe walks and drags it behind him). He may have a bit of cerebral palsy on his left side or he may just need to get some exercise. In Guatemala he was carried or in a stroller so much he never was able to build a lot of muscle. We will see the doctor again in 2 months to look at his progress. During all of these visits he and Levi played and entertained everyone.  He doesn't like it if I get too far away form  him, but that is a good sign.

Hell: It will be quite a while before we find out where PBJ is and what we can do to fight the situation. At this point, PGN has terminated our adoption, claiming the birth mother requested the baby back. They also determined the birth mother is possibly incompetent and therefore must undergo a homestudy to determine if she can parent PBJ.  The US government cannot do anything since the case is now terminated. We have a couple of options so far. 1) The birth mother and her family convince PGN they do not want PBJ and want her adoption to go through, and if the BM is incompetent then her parents can give consent, or 2) find PBJ and keep tabs on her until the new adoption system is up and running and then we can petition to adopt her under the new rules. We have a couple of other ideas, too. One is to make an offer to the government to provide PBJ with all of her care and needs, placing her back with the foster family and making sure her medical needs are met. The doctors are writing up reports to help us with that fight. The other is to request she be moved to the hogar under the supervision of the facilitator that we had with Ahren. His facility is nice and we could be sure we got all of her medical needs met. We would pay him directly for everything. The gov't might like that idea better, but who knows. it's not about the children. It is all about power right now. Power and money. Whoever wins the power will control all of the money in the future. One tiny little precious girl is nothing but a pawn in the power play. 

We are doing OK with all this. God is holding her right now. He has a plan that we just don't see yet. We will continue to fight to have her cared for, no matter if we get to parent her or not. It's not about us. It never has been. It is about her.

OK, I promise more pictures later today. Lots and lots of pics!


Anonymous said...

Many prayers being sent your way.

Farrah said...

I'm hoping all works out for PBJ.. I will keep you in my thoughts and prayers!!

Love knowing that Ahren is home and would love to see new pics of him with his new family...Is there a chance at a Family Shot?? Hint Hint

dana said...

Just for the record, you are incredible! But, I already knew that!
Love you!

Krystal said...

I am so happy for you and for Ahren.

I am so sad for you and for PBJ. It stinks when there are no "good" options. . . I'm praying.

Priscilla said...

i hope things turn around in pbj's case SOON. glad things are going so well with ahren. both are such cuties!

Anonymous said...

Thinking and praying each day for PBJ, you.. everyone involved.

I'm so happy you have little Ahren to love on! Snuggles and kisses do an achy heart good!


Angel said...

Eagle's Nest is also an amazing orphanage... that may be another option. Still they have had the same thing happen to them. Kids snatched from their orphanage without warning. One was snatched to be immediately adopted by a Guatemalan lady. At least the lady seemed really sweet. The whole process is so bizarre and corrupt. I hate it. :0( I'm so sorry. Hugs, Angel

Candy said...

Oh MRS WENDY...I just can't stand it that the GUATEMALAN GOVERNMENT had to take the WIND OUT OF YOUR SAIL...just when you were on CLOUD NINE...I respect you so much for the fight you are putting up for your daughter PBJ....I love getting to spend time with your family. Kya has been asking for Levi all afternoon she says LEVI sounds like FEFI, PLAY, AGAIN...

I loved SO MUCH getting to get a few HUGS and BESOS on Ahren today....It was so cool to get to hear him say new KYA...Kya...Kya...Oh I loved that!

Lucinda Naia said...

I rarely post - read fairly regularly. I cannot believe the state chose this action and removed her!

If there's a way to help, tell us. I'll gladly help however I can

Maria and Family said...

The loss of PBJ just breaks my heart...I have followed your journey for so long. That sweet baby deserves to be home with you. I will never understand how Guatemala thinks in terms of adoptions...and I went thru it ! I am so so sorry. Prayers for PBJ. Maria

Tracy said...

Wendy I am so sorry about PBJ. I am continuing to pray about this situation. I am so glad that Ahren is doing so well. I think of you and your family often.


Kids Special Needs said...

Stay strong, stay strong.

You are so right on the money with all of this.

It's been two years since we've seen our little girl. (almost 2.5years). I'm finally at a place where it brings me joy to see her picture, and not pain. We've pretty much resolved that there is a 99% chance we'll never see her again. So we consider it a gift to have had her while we did.

Feel free to email me at if you need to vent.

Yes, heaven & hell.

hugs, Esther