Tuesday, May 19, 2009

Moving on, looking for God's hand

I haven't really finished the story of PBJ for you, mostly because I still don't know the ending of it or really how I feel about it. For the whole story of our attempt at adopting her you can refer back to the posts I did in December titled Peri Brynn, Peri Brynn continued and Peri Brynn Part 3. The current status is that we do not have a case, the birth mother was deemed incompetent by the courts, PBJ is in an orphanage in limbo, and we can't do anything about it. There are a lot of things that went wrong from the very beginning.  We are accepting it and moving on, or at least making the effort to move on. How do you do that knowing she is out there and needs us so much? I don't know. 

For now I am focusing on seeing the work of God in the little things around me. Spring in the south has sprung and I am embracing it!

Blooming flowers full of color
Working on my butterfly/hummingbird garden
Tomatoes growing big and round
Blooms on the squash
Salvia, a plant that attracts butterflies
This is my redneck method of keeping the birds from feasting on my garden. So far it is working really well!
Plump peppers
The shiny new growth on a magnolia tree
Large rodent (I mean dog) sunbathing on the patio
Little helping hands
I love how the blooms and leaves are reaching for the sky
Cucumbers (or as the boys call them, pickle plants)
The corn is as high as an elephants eye (well, a really small elephant)

I am feeding my children and my broken heart with the bounty of the earth. 


Deb said...

I don't know what to say - I am crying for you, your family and PB. You are in my prayers.

I love your garden.

Love to you,

Dana said...

I cannot stand to see your heart broken. I love you so much and want to make everything alright. I haven't stopped praying, nor will I ever. My heart breaks for you and PBJ.
Love You!!

Diana said...

Like others, I don't know what to say about the whole PB thing. It is a heartbreaking situation all the way around. It's also yet another disgusting reminder of the dark side of adoption :-(

Love your gardens! It will be at least July here in the high desert (where winter is just starting to loosen it's grip) before our gardens look anywhere close to yours.

Vanessa said...

I still think about you and PBJ often!! You guys have never left my prayers!!

You garden is off to a great start by the way!

ManyBlessings said...

I'm so sorry. :( Is she still in the same place? If so, I promise to look for her when we go. Just let me know ok? ((HUGS)) to you!

Essie the Accidental Mommy said...

What a dreadful, dreadful story. So sorry for all of you! But that poor little girl, what a shame.

We had frost here a few weeks ago. No one has any vegetables, our tree's just started greening up!

Kim and Olav said...

I often wonder about your dear sweet pbj...I still hope that someday I will read she is home with the rest of your beautiful family

In the meantime, not sure if it a help or hindrance to you, but one thing God shared with me when I was stuck in Guatemala and we were trying to bring Lily home and I asked him...if we don't get her out of here...then who will save her?

His response...Kim, you are not her savior. I am....So then I asked (more like begged, pleaded, and cried) to Him at least could I have the privilege of being her parent?

P.s. I am so glad that ahren is better...scary....