Thursday, August 29, 2013


  For a long time I thought that the word 'twerking' referred to the spastic RAD behavior of traumatized kids. Like, 'oh no, he has been triggered and is really twerking now!' It's the perfect word to describe the bizarre, off the wall behaviors of these kids. Picking his nose until it bleeds? Total twerk. Shredding his food? The poop and pee issues? Seriously twerking. The inability to modulate the level of his voice, sit on a chair to eat, or remember what was said to him 10 seconds ago? Annoying twerking behaviors.

  This is the first week of school. We did everything we could to prepare for the transitions, the changes, the different routine. We stayed on the same bedtime and wake up routine all summer so we didn't have to readjust it twice. We talked daily about what we needed to do each morning. We organized school supplies, new lunch boxes and school clothes. Absolutely everything we could.....and yet it is never really enough. My little man is having a rough week. He is exhausted due to the high level of anxiety he has all day long. He can't calm down at night to fall asleep, he lays there twitching and rolling and talking to himself. He is behaving in school but it is taking everything he has to hold it together. At home he is a hot mess. Shredded food, bloody nose, pinching, hitting, screaming, etc. true twerking behavior. Poopy underpants and pee on the floor have also appeared but only a tiny bit. This year is better than last, so he is still making progress but I just hate seeing him so stressed out.

  So Miley Cyrus, you don't really know what true twerking is. Yours was choreographed, staged for maximum impact. Our kids also are going for maximum impact but everything in their lives drives them to twerking and they are masters of the craft. Until you have had a 4 year old head butt you in the face and try to literally scratch your eyes out, you haven't experienced true twerking.


Essie the Accidental Mommy said...

bwaaaaaaaaaaaah ha ha ha
omg, this is the best take on Mileygate I've seen. I think we should take back our phrase! Demand respect!

Anonymous said...

Sorry Jonathan is having a rough time. :( for my secondary anxiety and sleep issues, I have researched a ton and found things that have made a HUGE improvement with deep belly breathing (super easy) and mindfulness meditation. I thought meditation was this woo woo out there thing. It's not at all. I have my husband doing it now daily too. We both lay there and listen to the tracks on our iPods on low. We start and end the day this week. I found a CD that you don't have to DO anything. It's meant to be played on low and as long as you can hear the words, it helps calm the unconscious mind. Meditation has been documented to change brain waves. It's not this crazy far out thing I ignored for years. Any anxiety is caused by the sympathic AKA fight OT flight getting stuck on the "on" position (from sickness, trauma, etc.). deep belly breathing & meditation balance the parasympathetic (rest and digest system) with the fight or flight (sympathetic). I never knew this! It's so crazy to me that doctors will give people drug with terrible side effetcs and withdrawal effects (I've witnessed this both first and second hand) when (most, if not all of us) can so easily help our own systems. That's what they do in other countries. I never appreciated this but I've seen tremendous success in my own family and I've read about sooo many people that have been doing so good with these methods. Goldie Hawn was on katie curic with a doctor promoting her book for kids called 10 mindful minutes. Just 10 minutes a day. Schools are using her book with success for anxiety-ridden kids. I'm NOT a know at all. Far from it. I can just relate with the torment of insomnia and anxiety myself and from someone in my immediate family. Best of luck always. Hope he starts doing better. Take care. :)
M in NY

Anonymous said...

Just wanted to let you know I check Goldie hawn's book out on Barnes and noble and amazon -excellent reviews :)
Ok, night :)

Wendy said...

Hi M in NY,

We do relaxation exercises with him daily. We have to help him but it does seem to help. I also read a scientific article about movement on the brain and anxiety issues. It stated that 15 minutes of back and forth movement has an 8 hour calming effect on the brain. Sort of like the instinctive movements we make when holding an infant. Just simple back and forth. I either rock him or he swings each evening for 15 minutes. We are totally drug free right now. What you told me a while back made me rethink everything. We weaned him off and are going with natural options. What do you think about herbal remedies and supplements? I know some seem to have good evidence supporting them, but some can be just as dangerous as what the doctor prescribes. I tried a chamomile tea but he hated the taste. I have lavender air fresheners everywhere, too. I have used cold-laser therapy with him and massage. Anything you might suggest would be much appreciated!!!


Annie said...

VERY funny; honestly I've been living my life hearing that word and having absolutely NO CLUE. It's dancing? I thought it had something to do with something you'd Tweet! Like tweeting vulgarity.

Your definition is by far the best. Or perhaps in my techno version it is tweeting about your child's tantrum!