Thursday, May 13, 2010

Ramped up RAD

RAD kids, as most of you know, do NOT do well with change. Oh no no no no. Change = Bad. Well the past week here has been all about change. Lots of change. First, Ahren had his tonsils, adenoids and tubes/eardrum repair surgery which also meant he could not go to school for a week. Daddy stayed home that day. Then, our beloved Nanny's mother passed away and she has been gone all week. Sunday was Mother's Day. I stayed home this week and watched kids since nanny was gone. All minor things to us but HUGE to RAD kids.

Little S has done very well. A little more clingy, a couple of infractions just to test the limits but overall smooth sailing.

And then we have Ahren. Yes, he is uncomfortable and not feeling well. I know that. I have given him lots of lee-way for that. But last night was an all-time RAD-fest of epic proportions. He went to sleep at his normal time. I have been sleeping with him because he wakes up in the night with his throat hurting and needing meds and a drink. Last night at 11:30 he woke up and the fun began. The next 7 hours (yes SEVEN) were a series of screaming, hitting, kicking, pulling hair, throwing things, spitting and finally this morning peeing on me. At one point around 4am I had to go sit on the couch and not move because if I had moved it would have been to go in there and beat his little butt to a pulp. I know my limits and I had reached it! Chris was leaving for work then and a few kisses and kind words and I was back in control. Thank goodness he understands!

I finally left him screaming in his room at 6:30 am and stepped into the shower. I could still faintly hear him screaming and could hear him kicking the door, but I didn't care. Go ahead and kick the door. Break it, break your foot. Both were fixable.

And just when I could feel the knots starting to relax in my shoulders, the screaming got louder. He followed me and I forgot to lock the door! I ended up just dragging him into the shower with me, still wearing his pullup and still screaming. I finished my shower, wrapped him in a towel and plopped his little McScreamy butt on the floor as I got dressed. I got him dried off and into some clothes and amazingly as the sun came up, the screaming stopped.

Today is going to be a very long day.


BT said...

Oh goodness. Hope you can both get a little sleep and peace today.

ManyBlessings said...

Having been through nights like that I am sending you a giant virtual hug and vat of chocolate. Good lord those are tough times. ((HUGS))

Diana said...

Oh, UGH!!!! I've had my share of those scream fests. They REALLY bite - especially when they happen at night when you want to be sleeping.

Good for you for going to time out yourself. Sometimes that's the only thing we can do. I've so been there wanting to pummel my kids into next year. It is frightening beyond frightening to realize how easily we could do it and end up as the lead story on the 10:00 news, isn't it?

Do lots of snuggles and quiet time today if you can. Make his world as small as possible. Sometimes it's impossible to know what's really triggering our kids, but if we can reground them and reestablish that this is a loving and safe place to be, that helps a lot.

I also suggest doing some baby bottle and blanket time - you hold the bottle always. Fill the bottle with something sweet and soothing both to his soul and his hurting throat...sweet warm milk maybe.

Praying you can sneak in a nap for yourself as well.

Anonymous said...

Sounds like it could have started out as a night terror, scary stuff, and they don't seem to know if you are there or not as nothing calms them.
Hoping that he gets back on track soon and that you get to recharge your battery's through out the day.
Jo from South Australia.

Reba said...

I am so sorry. :( I know that it is part of it, but it sure is tough when it is happening. And here I was complaining about the two hour or so one we had here the other night. I appreciate your honesty SO much; it makes me feel better that even when I am reacting calmly on the outside, sometimes I don't feel like that on the inside! Hope you get some good rest. It seems like you should both be exhausted!


I remember those days all too clearly and it was with a child I gave birth to! UGH!

I hope your day improved as it went on and that you had time to put up those feet of yours at some point. Kudo's for the shower move, feeling clean and fresh is a bonus!

You're an amazing Mom Wendy!