Saturday, February 27, 2010

How to score on a Home Study

We have been in the adoption arena for many years and during that time we have learned a lot of things. One of the most stressful parts of an adoption is the home study. Here comes a total stranger to inspect your home and rate you as prospective parents. It is terrifying! Will they look in the closets? In the oven? Under your bed????? In my experience, the social workers were so nice and my anxiety was totally un-called for, but still, I stressed. Each and every time.

So here are my secrets to acing that most important interview. The home study.....

First, be sure your children are perfectly groomed. Not a hair out of place........

Have lots of inspirational signs all over the house. Shows them you have a great outlook on life.
Keep lots of healthy snacks in plain sight. Healthy food builds healthy kids ya know!!!!!
Show them that your childs health is first and foremost. Vitamins, minerals, immunity boosters and...um, Nestles Quik. Yeah, very important. Milk..makes a body good. Or something like that.
Make sure you have a really cool pet. Social workers love rodents. If not a rodent, be sure to have a big hairy tarantula or at least a poisonous snake.
There should always be some unexpected decorations in the house. Random rubber mice stuck to the ceiling are very good.
Have a really organized pantry, showing lots of healthy food. It is a huge bonus if you can have random religious material in amongst the food. (See the yellow cross? It says, 'To God, You are the Best".)
So follow our lead and you are sure to impress and even WOW that social worker with your awesomeness. Oh, and one more thing. Be sure to show them the un-flushed toilets so they know your children are regular!!! You can thank me now for no pictures.......

6 comments:

Reba said...

LOL, you always tickle me (and inspire me). I remember how worried I got about the homestudy. Had the place spotless. She did walk around the house but that was about it. My favorite part? When our two kids (at the time) came out dressed up like a pirate or a knight or something and charged at my hubby with a plastic sword. They were TERRIBLE that night. I finally leaned over and with gritted teeth and a smile (Social Worker didn't hear me) and said, "You are in SO much trouble." Later she told us that one of the things that impressed her was how we handled our kids. :)

Deb said...

Thanks for the laugh tonight. I needed it.

Starting to consider a second adoption from foster care- these tips will win me points and put my family at the top of the list.

love and hugs,
Deb

Lisa said...

Ha!!! Ha!!!! I love it! I remember our home study jitters. The lady never even looked at my nice clean house and when she left I was disappointed. All that work for nothing! lol
Love the rat!

Lilith said...

I can't even begin to imagine the stress someone goes through in regards to the adoption process. Your tips though were quite funny!

I'm curious, how in the world did the mouse get stuck to the ceiling?

URBAN BLONDE said...

Hilarious! But where was the bottles of liquor? :)

When we were having our home study done, I was positive everything looked perfect in our house.

The social worker asked us if we drank and we both said we were "social drinkers and rarely imbibed" she then pointed over to one of our bookcases and asked us about the large bottle (think HUGE) of Cointreau liqueur that was sitting (smiling no doubt) on the shelf that friends had brought to our housewarming party about 4 years earlier and was about half empty.

I stumbled through some explanation but then the social worker laughed. I think my husband and I shook for about an hour after she left!

Shanti said...

ha! that is hilarious. so true, so true...