Monday, December 05, 2011


In October we had the annual Say No To Drugs Week where each day the kids got to wear something special. In years past there has been slippers day, hat day and sunglasses day. The favorite day this year was crazy hair day. Having only boys it challenged my mad hair skillz. Here is what we came up with.

The Alfalfa with gold glitter

The Golden Storm

Scary Mess with Green Hi-lights

Halloween is a huge trigger for trauma kiddos. I'm not sure exactly why, but invariably it brings out the demons and the behaviors we would love to forget. This year Ahren was totally un-fazed. He has only had very minor issues in the past so it did not surprise me. Seth began having terrible nightmares about 2 weeks before the holiday. I asked his therapist to work with him on the issue of Halloween so she did. My rule has always been that the kids had to wear non-violent costumes. She actually suggested that I let Seth dress up in scary costumes so that it took the mystique out of it. I was hesitant to try it, but figured it was worth a try.

Pumpkin carving. Always a favorite and yucky activity!

It was 80 degrees and no shirts meant no laundry mess. Just a quick wash up and we were done!

Will this child ever get teeth???

So, following the advice of the therapist, I let the boys choose their costumes. Ahren is Darth Vader (I wouldn't let him wear the helmet to trick-or-treat) Seth is a Zombie/Mummy and Levi is Jason (He didn't know who that was but saw the mask and thought it was cool.) Much to my surprise, Seth's nightmares stopped, he began to talk about the cool costumes and how they were make believe and fun, and he thoroughly enjoyed the evening. You know, parenting these kids is counter-intuitive at times. What you think would be the worst thing ever for them turns out to be the perfect thing to help them work through something. This obviously will not work for all kids, but in this case the therapist was dead on.


Diana said...

Hmmm...interesting concept. I'm still not doing Halloween anymore. I've hated it for years (long before my hurt kiddos came along) and my neighborhood is horrible about Halloween. Have no desire to resurrect that one. But, putting some scary costumes in our new healing room we're putting in our house because we have no qualified therapists within 100 miles might be an idea worth exploring. Because you're right. EVERYTHING is counter-intuitive.

ManyBlessings said...

I'm with Diana on the "hmmm...."

More food for thought....